Thursday, March 4, 2010

Oh how I love Thee




How grateful I am for the savior....this morning, was a bad morning. I decided to read my scriptures and a story came to my mind. I began to read of the story of the woman who had a blood disorder and through the crowds touched Christ's robe and was healed. Jesus turned and asked who touched him and went to the woman and told her that her faith had made her whole.

This is one of my favorite story's of the Savior for two reasons. 1: The immense faith of that woman. I believe I have a strong faith, but it could always be stronger, this woman is such an example to me. I hope I will always know that I can place all of my burdens on the savior and he will help me. 2: This is my favorite part of the story, Christ knew she was there...he must have been touched by tons of people at that time, yet he felt HER, he knew she was there and she needed him. What a beautiful reminder that he is always aware of me.

Sometimes its hard to think that we are special, we (or at least I) may think, there are billions of billions of children of God, why would he pay attention to my petty problem. But its so not true. God knows us individually, and he is more than aware of all that troubles us. Nothing is too small for him to help with....

I remembered an Apostle speak about how one day, he spent the day with God, he went to a quite place in the woods and prayed and read scriptures and just felt his presence. Today, I decided to spend the day with God, I said a prayer and asked him to stay with me today, I listened to church music, read scriptures, prayed, and watched The Testaments. Oh how I love my Savior. He is never failing and always there when I need him. He has never let me down or turned me away. It is easy to forget sometimes amidst all the craziness of life, to just take a step back and spend a little time with the Savior. I think I will do this more often. The best way to fix a broken heart is through Christ.

" He lives,my kind wise heavenly friend. He lives and loves me to the end...He lives to calm my troubled heart, he lives all blessings to impart."

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Monday, March 1, 2010

Walls


I heard a song today that really moved me and made me think. Its by Miranda Lambert called The house that built me. Its about a girl who feels lost and goes back to the house she grew up in hoping she might find herself again. Anyway, its been a rough little while for me and its been hard trying to work with some ghosts of mine. It made me think of all the houses I grew up in. I began to wonder what good it would do me to go back....I thought about what happened within the walls of each of those houses that "built" me. I can think of 3 of the 5 that I wouldn't really want to revisit, let alone relive. I thought of some walls where I laughed with my best friend, where I stayed up late getting to know my new sisters, where I talked all night on the phone to my first love. Walls that watched me learn to play the flute. Watched me learn to love a new dad. Walls that protected me in a tornado. Walls where I got a new family. In some walls I grew up faster than I wanted, in some I saw things, experienced things that haunt me still today. and walls where I lost a dad, and my family was torn apart. I thought about all these walls from my past, and all the walls in my now. Now I am surrounded by new walls, walls that see me smile laugh and cry with my best friend. Walls that don't see a little girl. Walls that see a women, a wife, the person that I am today because of all the other walls I had to pass through. "You leave home, you move on and you do the best you can, I got lost in this old world and forgot who I am." In some ways a broken person because of those past walls. As I think of that, I think its important to remember all the walls we have passed through. We can't know where we are going if we forget where we came from. I have been feeling a little lost within myself lately and as I reflect on all that I have lived through, it helps remind me of who I am. I am not sure what my point is exactly, I am really just rambling random thoughts, but I guess my point is that life is just a series of walls we pass through and its what goes on inside them that counts. We are brought into this world with walls, walls that hold our spirits, walls that we leave after this life is over.
....anyway, in other news, Gare Bare is doing great. He is working his little tush off to do well on the GMAT. I am really proud of all that he has accomplished and that all that he is about to accomplish. We have been super busy between school, GMAT, and spending time with family. Garrett and I have basically lived with our Aunt Trina and Uncle Luke...nothing can help heal an aching heart like family. Oh and babies, they have the most adorable baby twins, and let me tell you..Garrett and I have been tempted! lol...but we shall refrain for now ;)I also just wanna say how much I love that I married my best friend. I think I picked the most patient and loving guy alive. I picked someone who will hold me while I cry and sing primary songs to me just to help me feel Jesus when I am missing him. Marriage is beautiful and its my greatest blessing. I hope everyone its doing well!!!